"AND THIS IS WHAT YOULL GET IN FOOD STAMPS AND SECTION 8 ONCE YOU GRADUATE."

"YA KNOW, I STILL DON'T APPRECIATE YOU PLAYING 'BORN IN THE U.S.A.' AT MY INAUGURATION."

"ARE YOU THE ONE WHO TOOK ALL MY DADDY'S MONEY?"

"I'LL JUST BOOK VACATIONS EVERYWHERE: IT'S NOT LIKE I'M PAYING FOR THEM."

"IT'S OK. WE'LL MAKE THE TAXPAYERS CLEAN IT UP."

"WAIT! JUST ONE MORE LIE!"

"I'M HERE TODAY TO ANNOUNCE MY NEW TAX ON HAPPINESS."

"GET THIS STRAIGHT, BARRY. ARIZONA DOESN'T ALLOW UNDOCUMENTED WORKERS ... SO LET ME SEE YOUR PAPERS!"

"WHERE'S MY FREE SHIT?!"

"GOOD GOING, BARRY. I ONLY SCREWED A WHITE HOUSE AIDE; YOU SCREWED THE ENTIRE COUNTRY."

"... AND THIS IS THE SMOKE AND MIRRORS WE USED TO FLEECE THE TAXPAYERS AND UNJUSTLY ENRICH YOUR MOST GENEROUS DONORS!"

Source: lmaobama.com